Why do some people confide too quickly?
Barely met, just the conversation started, this is already this (the) unknown (e) you entrusts his life from every angle. You're embarrassed, but not visibly enough to cut the whistle. Exploration of the phenomenon with the psychologist and psychotherapist Muriel Mazet author of the book "To finally free the gaze of the other", published by Editions Eyrolles.
Summary
1.Too much naive trust in human nature
2.A sign of narcissistic personality
3.To talk about what?
4.The unknown, the good prey
5.To know how to say stop
And if you entrust yourself too quickly?
Too much naive trust in human nature
We are not all ace of communication. For some of us, it's even hard to come into contact with the human race. So sometimes when we do not know how to do, when we do not find the right distance, between too much restraint and too much confidence, we start and grope. "Often the person who exposes his life too quickly is very naive and tends to have too much confidence in human nature, says our expert.Surely excessive.It awaits an adequate response to its opening ... c that is, the other behaves with such spontaneity but it is not always the case, which is why it can be easy prey for malicious or perverse people. "
A sign of narcissistic personality
This is not to exclude ... A tongue too well hung can also reveal a narcissistic personality. The other does not exist. The other is only a pretext, there is no place for him in some way. "No matter what you want to say, you have to dump on the other," explains Muriel Mazet, "everything is good to express your uneasiness, because by doing so, the person is unfortunately not in the link sharing and sharing, and you will notice that she never asks questions about you just to stay focused on her. "
To talk about what?
Everything and nothing. Rain, good weather but also his life, difficulties, doubts, questions and sometimes even his intimate life. This is even more embarrassing and destabilizing for the listener. "It acts without filter in some way, explains our specialist, it does not have the faculty to distinguish the inside and the outside or the social and the intimate.These people can pass for immodest people not being aware of this. who can say himself and what is not said ".
The unknown, the good prey
This is legitimate: in times of loneliness, internal malaise, recurrent isolation may have tried to seek everywhere outside help. The perfect stranger then becomes an extraordinary confidant. "There is no issue with the unnamed guest in a party, or the traveler sitting next to us in a train ... No emotional investment, deduced our specialist.So this"it is very dangeous link flash "does not open any As a consequence of the other's view, the fear of a more or less serious judgment does not exist because it will never be seen again ".
To know how to say stop
Stay tuned to your own limits. It is useless to undergo this conversation, either out of politeness or duty or personal obligation. When the person speaks to you, do you begin to feel diffuse discomfort? You have the feeling of not being taken into account, that the conversation is done in one direction and especially is uninteresting? You can react. "It's time to say stop and run away if you feel like it, because there are people who are really invasive and pump the energy, warns the psychologist, do it if you can with kindness. No need to be scornful, mean or aggressive, you can simply explain to the person that right now you are tired and that you can not focus on what she is trying to explain to you. about her behavior by telling her that people could use her naivety or that she could eventually lose emotional ties with her dear friends. "
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